Let’s discuss how you can control, limit or alleviate your vices.
But let’s be more specific.
Let’s talk about a topic that keeps, coming up, on my Twitter timeline.
Let’s dive in, deep…
It’s apparently something that a lot of people struggle with.
And it’s apparently something that people feel strongly about.
So, let’s try & come up with some potential solutions.
Triggers & feelings
Porn, as with social media notifications, especially RTs, likes & follows, are like dopamine hits.
You get a rush from them.
Although, it appears porn gives you a rush to a much greater extent.
These dopamine hits alter your mood, making you excited and ready for action.
That’s how porn works.
For many that I’ve spoken to, they’re chasing the exhilarating rush they experienced the first time of watching it.
Which is the same reason many people get hooked on drugs, alcohol, etc.
Those first experiences are more pure and exciting.
When I look at the correlation between porn & alcohol, I can’t see much difference between them:
- Both are hard to give up
- Both are readily available
- Both are considered cool & even manly by most
- Both will directly & indirectly lead to your death
- Both will leave you feeling ashamed & depressed
- Both are more addictive than people give them credit for
And that last point is key.
Porn is addictive.
And it’s very unhealthy if used incorrectly, as with most things, hence the word Vice.
Understanding the effects
It’s unhealthy for a few reasons:
- It creates a false sense of what is normal in your everyday, or future sex life.
- It’s an illusion
- It’s just a series of dopamine hits
- It’s a false representation of connection
- It’s characters acting out the joy you should be out experiencing
- It’s misrepresents a whole host of things that happen in real life sex
Essentially, it’s not real.
It’s not what real intimate sex is.
People that argue otherwise are unfortunately in denial and will sadly struggle down the line.
Nothing will live up to what they’re watching. The images are designed for you to want more, to hook you and make you tune back in every single time until it replaces your normal sex life.
- The effect it has on your body, mind and soul.
Lack of sleep.
Avoiding work, friends, and even sex, for more & more consumption.
Not hard enough, in both senses of the word.
You feel dirty. You start to look dirty. You want to be dirty.
These are all examples of what is being done to your body, mind and soul.
These are all things that people have shared with me via DM & email so it’s no wonder I keep seeing the issue of porn addiction popping up on my Twitter timeline.
It’s sad to think how many people are suffering silently.
It develops a craving. A craving which you must satisfy to be able to function.
This is addiction.
Get honest with yourself.
Admit that you have a problem or at least acknowledge that you may have a problem.
This is the beginning.
This is the most important step.
Do some research.
See if you can get some knowledge about what you are feeling. Your struggles.
Search for people that have experienced what you are going through.
YouTube videos, podcasts, documentaries.
From this point on, you’ll probably be able to find out if there are any support groups out there for you.
Find your tribe.
When you open up and admit to yourself & others about what is going on, that you may have a problem or that you may need some help. You’ll find that you’re not alone.
Find a support network.
It’s powerful to know that you have support. It’s powerful to know that others may have, or may currently be, dealing with the same issues as you.
Find a more positive outlet
Think about what it’s doing to your body, mind & soul and take action to replace this damaging habit.
You need a healthier outlet to express yourself. To get that same feeling, if you feel anything anymore and it’s not just a force of habit, to get that same rush.
Substitute it with something else.
The obvious answer is exercise.
It creates the same dopamine hits.
And you can do it instantly.
When the urge hits, drop and do some press ups. Do some squats. Go for a run. Do anything that take your mind off your craving and replace the feeling you once got.
What if the urge is too strong or sneaky?
It’s difficult but taking a second to pause directly after the impulse to collect your thoughts, clear your mind and to do something else, whatever it is that works for you. I’ve suggested exercise but maybe it’s a cold shower or listen to music or call someone.
It’ll be hard at first but once you recognise when you’re feeling that feeling, when that urge is there and you have something that now you do instead of the habit then you do that enough and the impulse will slowly start to go.
You’ve replaced the destructive outlet for that feeling and replaced it with a healthier one.
If you take what I’ve outlined and apply it to your own vices, if it’s not porn, I’m sure that the solutions laid out here can help you:
Find a support network.
Find a more positive outlet.
Repeat until cravings disappear.
This sounds more simple than it is, and I’m not downplaying your vices, you just need to know that sometimes the simplest ways of dealing with these things is often the best solution.
Birth of Clarity
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